The one where I turn 30.

Thirty, flirty and thriving? Well, as much as any pregnant girl can be flirty- I suppose I’m doing my best to capture all of the above.  Thriving? Absolutely.  How could I not consider myself thriving?  I have everything I could ask for.  My husband loves me, appreciates me and supports me.  My son inspires me and basically makes my heart beat.  I’m growing and learning and striving every day- my life is not stale.  I have life growing in my belly that I can day-dream about and nurture.  Being a mom gives me purpose. 

Now for the thirty part.  I have dreaded that number for quite a few years. I would say that I’ve dreaded it my whole life, but to be honest- I didn’t start thinking about it until I was about 5 years out.  It wasn’t a very real threat until then.  Mike turned 30 about 2 and a half years ago, and I took that pretty hard.  My stomach did a flippy flop when I told myself, “My husband is 30. Ugh.”  I thought it was a pretty bad sign of how I was going to handle it myself.  I never understood young Jenna’s wish in 13 going on 30.  Who (under 30) would ever wish to be 30? Especially at 13?! Get real!

Luckily, I have the best husband in the whole world.  No offense to all you wives or husbands out there.  It’s true though. I don’t even feel like I’m exaggerating when I say it.  To make my 30^th birthday special, Mike arranged a pretty big surprise and took me to New York City to watch my Giants play their home opener for Monday Night Football.  He had warned me that I wouldn’t be going to school Monday night so I was aware that something was planned, but I had been imagining a party with all my friends, decorations, a cake and all that.

Never would I have imagined I’d be sitting under the stadium lights in the crisp evening air, the cheers of the fans vibrating in my body, knowing I was close enough to hit turf if I wanted to spit on it, but not wanting to inadvertently hit anyone.

I found out about a week early because Mike used my ebay account to purchase the football tickets and I received the push notification to my phone that we had won.  The notification said, “Congratulations! You have won ebay item ‘GIANTS vs RAMS 9/19” I was actually in the bath tub with Reed when I got it and couldn’t help the splashing that resulted from my excitement. We were going to the Giants game!! I started thinking about the logistics… “it’s probably in St Louis, we’re probably driving, staying with the Fousts, taking Reed and leaving him with the Fousts, how kind of them, we will probably leave Saturday and come back Tuesday. Oh what a long drive…”

I called my mom. I had to tell her that I found out about my birthday surprise and I was in a predicament. Do I tell Mike that I know? Do I hide it and let him present the surprise in his own way?? Mom’s response, “I know you’re a good actress, honey, but honesty is always the best policy.” So, when Mike got home, I told him that I loved him very much (as I bounced up and down on the couch) and he said he loved me, too. I said, “I KNOW you do!” Then I told him about the ebay notification.  He was disappointed that he didn’t get to surprise me, but he was relieved that he didn’t have to keep a secret anymore and was ready to share all the plans with me.  I asked him about St Louis and he said, “No, babe. We’re going to NEW YORK.” I peed my pants a little.  He filled me in on our flight and hotel arrangements and said his mom was coming to stay with Reed (oh the conspiracy of it all!)

I began to wonder if I would be okay while away from Reed. I’ve never spent a night away from him and I had to consider that while I thought I would be fine emotionally and mentally- I might actually not be fine.  You never know about these things until you’re actually in the sticky of it.  Add on top of that, the fact that I’m pregnant and you have to consider the effect of pregnancy hormones. I pictured myself breaking down and sobbing in the middle of Times Square, crying, “I need my baby!”  I’m happy to report I was fine.  I missed him in a healthy happy way and just the perfect amount, too.  I thought about him a lot and had to hold back from buying him everything under a neon light. I have to remind myself that he’s growing so quickly that he doesn’t keep clothes around very long.  Then there’s me and my swelling uterus. I’m even less fun to shop for! I want to buy something I can wear now, but it’s such a waste of money!

We stayed up late every night- never making it back to the hotel anywhere near midnight. Date night was a scrumptious steak dinner at Rothman’s Steakhouse, but most meals were “pizza by the slice” whenever we passed one. Fluffy’s Café was our regular breakfast spot where we enjoyed New York breakfast bagels. By the way, a bagel is not a bagel unless it’s New York bagel. (Luckily we have such a place in OKC.)

We rented bikes and rode around Central Park on the beautiful sunny Sunday afternoon. We rode over to the “Seinfeld Diner” which is the store front they used for the sitcom. A peek inside confirmed that they didn’t use the inside for filming ;o) A disappointing comedy club for entertainment that night rounded out the day.

Monday was shopping on 5^th avenue, where I also got my hair cut. I regret not taking a picture of my view from where I sat and got my tresses maimed. It was an incredible view! 

What can I say about the football game so not to bore my readers? I’ve just glanced up at the length of this post and realized I might not have your attention much longer- your watch is ticking away precious minutes of your day!  Emails to answer, online bills to pay, laundry to fold… yet here you are. Maybe.

We took the train to New Jersey, which dropped us off practically at the front doors to the stadium. Security searches and pat downs were in order for all fans and being a lady, I got to stand in a ridiculously short line so I was in way before Mike was. 

The atmosphere of a live NFL game will make your pulse race. My heart felt huge in my otherwise hollow chest, my ears filled with the roar of fans and my eyes sparkled with reflections from the bright stadium lights and animated screens.  Hixon’s TD catch was my favorite catch ever. It was so very exciting and yet I had an empty seat next to me when I turned to celebrate with high fives! I had to catch one from the row below us.  Mike was on a popcorn and mt dew run. 

The Giants won- a surprise to many.  I would have been happy with a loss but only because of the history I have with the Giants and being at their home openers.  In 2007 Mike and I went to NYC for the Giants home opener against Brett Favre and the Packers. They lost the game but went on to win the Super Bowl against the previously undefeated Patriots. So you can see how either way, I would have been happy.  Now, I can’t have a whole lot of hope for the Super Bowl this February.

Reed did great staying home with Grandma. He happily played, learned new words and let himself be spoiled to his core.  We sent him a couple of videos that Grandma played for him on her phone. I wondered if it would upset him by making him realize we weren’t around, but she said he just smiled and went about his activities. Great. I’m glad we’re such important pieces of his life. Of course, I much prefer him to be happy while we’re gone and not sad.  Maybe he needed the break, too!

When they picked us up at the airport, I slid my fingers into the curls at the back of his head, kissed the bridge of his nose and ran my finger along the baby soft skin under his chin- just as I had imagined I would.  Then I proceeded to pretend to eat his face from one side and then the other. He was laughing and smiling until he realized I wasn’t unbuckling him from the car seat. He wanted to be held, so he wasn’t satisfied with me merely getting into the back seat with him.

As I began to recover from my sinus infection that I suffered from over the weekend I was falling prey to the consequences of an hour and a half of sleep. My actual birthday was a tough pill to swallow. Mike and I spend the day sprawled on the living room floor watching Reed play until finally, mercifully, it was bedtime.

New York- wait for me. I will return!  

The one about Reed's baby brother

Bryce at 22 weeks (profile picture of head).

We just got home from our third ultrasound for Reed's baby brother.  With Reed, we only had 2 ultrasounds total because we declined any extra (optional) screenings for problems and birth defects.  Mike and I had decided early on that since we weren't really at risk based on any family history or other factors, then we didn't need to spend the extra time and money.  Of course, we love seeing the ultrasounds, a chance to take a glimpse inside and see what the baby is doing, but not necessary for us in the grand scheme of things.
This baby is giving us less choices.  We've had 3 ultrasounds and are planned for another one in a couple months.We found out a our last appointment that my platelets were slightly low so they wanted to take another look and do the level two ultrasound, which is usually the "down syndrome and birth defects" picture.  We got to take a look at our perfectly healthy/no concerns whatsoever baby in 4D.  And guess what? It's still a boy.  No change there!  Our first ultrasound was at 16 weeks and she said 90% certainty that it's a boy.  At the 19 week appointment- boy.  Now, 22 weeks- boy!  We will schedule another ultrasound between 30 and 32 weeks and I'm sure they'll mention boy again... In fact, this doctor today told us, "if this baby comes out a girl they better be looking around in there for something that fell off!"

Dad teaching Reed to drive.

Yes, it's public knowledge that I wanted a daughter, and over the last few weeks I've battled with some pretty intense emotions.  However, I've come to realize that I'm not the only one affected by the gender of this baby.  God has a plan, I always thought his was inline with mine- but whatever, and maybe he knows what he was doing after all.  Perhaps Reed needs this baby brother.  The difference the gender of this baby makes in his life is astronomical.  Just imagine a few snapshots of his life as a big brother to a little sister.  Reed protecting her, her bossing him around, embarrassing him, them fighting as teenagers and hating the people each other date because they'll never be good enough.  Now imagine some snapshots with a little brother, playing the same sports, wrestling around in the living room, supporting each other and "having each other's backs," they will each be the best man at each other's weddings.  Maybe God specifically wanted Reed to have a little brother because there is some major life event that they need each other for.  I don't know.  Trust me, I've played out my whole life with and without a daughter in my mind's eye.  But only recently did I start to think about the other people involved here.  Mike with a son and a daughter. Mike with two sons.  I believe this was just meant to be. 
When Bryce comes into this world to make his mark, he will prove me right on all counts.  His presence will be so strong and so definite that I couldn't imagine anyone's life without him, especially not my own.


He will be different from Reed. Somehow they will both shine bright and find their own stage with their own spotlight.  Yet they will be brothers and everyone will know them as "The Franklin boys."

Reed at his 1yr appt after shots

I am sometimes so overwhelmed by how completely awesome Reed is that I can't imagine giving my heart to any other boy.  How could anyone measure up?  How is that even fair to expect him to?  Reed is amazing- hilarious, smart, loving, strong and oh boy is he handsome.  I can't look at him without thinking how simply perfect he is.  
I thought that if I had a daughter that would give her all the uniqueness she would need to stand out and apart from Reed. To be her own.  But I know it won't matter.  Bryce will be loved equally and fairly, despite the hand-me-down clothes and toys.  *wink*
My due date is January 19th but I'm expecting the doctor to push it back soon.  At each of the three ultrasounds they have measured Bryce to be about a week behind.  So today, instead of 22 weeks, he looks more like 21 and one day.  This is not an exact science, but since the due date was determined off my last cycle before getting pregnant, I think the ultrasounds are a little more accurate.  Anyway, he will keep growing perfectly and we will worry about due dates and delivery at a much later date!

The one about last bottles and first words

Reed has been off his bottle for about two weeks now.  I had over-analyzed and worried about the transition away from the bottle, but it turns out that I completely over estimated Reed's love for it. He had me fooled.  I thought he was so completely attached to it that he would never be able to go one without one.  For about a week before his first birthday we started putting whole milk in his cups at meal times, but the mornings and nights ... and naps.... he was still getting bottles.  Mike and I relied heavily on the bottle to put him back to sleep if he woke in the night.  It was the sure fast way- and perhaps because we relied on it, we thought he relied on it.  A couple of nights after his first birthday I felt like he had drank plenty of milk before bed and we just put him down.  He fell asleep without a peep and slept just fine.  There were two nights right at the beginning that I warmed milk in his sippy cup and rocked him in his dark bedroom.  Even that didn't really seem necessary.  Now I have washed and sterilized all the bottles to be stored until his little brother arrives. 
So, way to go Reed.  Once again he has made me look like a complete rookie!


Reed has spoken his first word!  It's only natural that it goes with his new "thing."  Reed has always loved his dad's hat.  If Mike's wearing a cap, Reed is pulling on it and trying to eat it.  One day we realized that he was getting more frustrated than usual so Mike just took his hat off and put it on Reed.  It was like this wave of relief washed over him, "Finally! Geez! what took you guys so long to figure out what I wanted?!"  And from that moment on he was only happy if he had dad's hat on.  Its much too big of course, so it falls off a lot and doesn't stay on right in the car so I dug through Reed's closet and found a couple of caps that I'd bought for him.  Bingo! He has an Old Navy hat that fits him perfectly right now.  Come to find out, it didn't need to be dad's hat but it needed to be like dad's hat. 
Reed's word is HAT.  He takes it off and says "hat", tries with all his might to place it back onto his head, but to no avail.  
We really thought bike was going to be his first word- because he really loves them so much.  But I think I misinterpreted his infatuation.  I am pretty sure it's specifically the wheels that he loves.  When he points to things we try to give him the correct word so there's a lot of "Truck", "Car", "Bike" and so on. All things with wheels.  Somewhere along the way I think he decided that wheel is "Truck" because now everything with wheels is "truck".  Another rookie parenting mistake.  The other thing I'm sure I've thoroughly confused him on is water.  He thinks water is "Hot".  This whole thing started in the bathtub when he kept turning the hot water faucet on.  Mom kept repeating "Hot"... now all water is "Hot". Excellent. 
Nonetheless, Mike and I are ecstatic that Reed is trying to communicate with us.  We were slightly concerned because at his 1 year appointment his pediatrician said that Reed should have at least one word by now.  There weren't any sounds that Reed would use consistently for a specific object.  We started to worry that we were doing something wrong or not working with him enough.  I mean, sure, we could say that quite a few times he said a word or two for this thing or that thing, but- to me, he has to be using the same sound consistently for the object or it's not a "word".  It's just a coincidence. 

We are both very satisfied now!

The one where we had a big fire drill

Last week was very eventful.  Reed and I were home on Tuesday just minding our own business and going about our day. As I was feeding him lunch I noticed the sky turning a strange brownish orange color and that's when I started getting texts and facebook messages about the fire.  This fire started burning about 4 miles south of us and was rapidly approaching.  I kept telling myself that they were going to get it put out or under control any time and didn't think it was necessary for Mike to come home from work at first.  However, since we were in the direct line of fire, eh hem, it became apparent that our actions needed to reflect worse case scenario and at least be prepared as much as we could.  Just before Mike made it home a patrol car came through our neighborhood and told us that we were under voluntary evacuation. We weren't mandatory yet, but he said that we might as well head out before it go to that point.
I spent a total of about 2 hours gathering and packing our belongings.  We took everything that we could fit into both our vehicles.

I assume most everyone has had the discussion, "if our house was on fire- what would we grab on the way out?"  Well, I will reassure you by saying that list is pretty short and will actually fit in a pile on the passenger seat of your car.  The hard part is when you have two vehicles worth of space that you can fill and you have the time to do it, too.  I had two of our largest suitcases opened on the floor and just felt the space staring at me... daring me really.  Threatening me to fill it with "valuables" things I can't live without. All I could do was wander around from room to room asking myself, is this important enough to take?  Everything seemed so significant and yet at the same time everything seemed so insignificant.  Don't ask me how that works.  After the laptop, ipad, cameras, chargers, legal documents and certificates, external hard drive, jewelry, memory cards and identification papers were collected I was stumped.
I tried to make decisions based off the idea that we might be living in an apartment while we rebuild.  What will make life easier? What will be the most helpful?  Pizza slicer... ice cream scoop.  We might as well have these things, I mean, we're going to have to replace them if we don't take them... yet we have perfectly good utensils right here.
I packed snacks.  Fruit snacks, applesauce and granola bars. I packed clothes and underwear- this when I realized how much of my underwear I actually hate.  Trust me, there's room for underwear and it's easier if you can just grab a couple handfuls and toss them in, but I only wanted specific pairs of underwear.

Yes, I was emotional.  I was bleary eyed as I put illogical things together in my bags.  When Mike got home, I felt much better.  A calm had settled over the house and the environment had changed from frantic-emotional and nonsensical to a calculated, strategic business operation.  We efficiently made progress together and rational decisions came easily.  He was my rock in the middle of the white water river.  I flung myself out of the rapids and onto his smooth surface where I could sit and watch the chaos around me and not be afraid anymore.
I know that among many other things this is what makes our marriage work.  We fill each other's voids.
Once we had both vehicles packed we made our journey to the Harper's house.  I have to tell you, it was really hard to back out of the driveway.  I almost couldn't make myself do it.  Memories were playing through my mind, emotions pouring over me.  I found myself rolling backwards and watching the space between the house and the car grow and feeling very numb.  At some point I knew I had to snap myself out of it and just move forward.
Our good friends, Keith and Cassie, kept us company while we all watched the news that evening until we gave up and went to bed.  We could only hope that our house was still standing when the sun rose the next morning.  Its obvious now that it was and even tho our house survived the night and we were past the worst of it, the next couple days were a roller coaster of continued flare ups all around our home.  Wednesday I was coming home from work and saw the smoke pouring over Hefner rd, which is the road we live off of.  As I got closer, it appeared the smoke was pouring out of our neighborhood and I was just glad that we hadn't unloaded the cars.  The news channels were reporting the fire location as one mile east of us and the firefighters were on it like blue bonnet.
That night when I got home from school it was dark and I could see the light of the flames pulsing over the rooftops as I neared our house.  Mike and I stood out in the yard and just watched as the fire surged and ebbed as tho it had a heartbeat.  My mom sent me a text with a message from my sister.  She said she had a spare room that wasn't on fire.  Undoubtedly a generous offer, even if the room is in Wyoming.  Finally after day three we unpacked the cars and felt safe to say we weren't going anywhere.
Bless those firefighters who fought so hard to keep our homes and neighborhoods safe.  They worked long days in extreme conditions.  It was already 105 degrees outside and they were out in their full protective gear working right up next to the fires and battling the smoke.  It went on for days and we wondered if they would ever get a break.
I think about my mental and emotional state during this time and I think about the people who did lose their homes last week.  I can only relate to the preparation part, but I can't relate to the end result.  The acceptance that their houses are gone.  How very sad.  But of course, like everyone keeps telling me- at least we are all safe.